Living and breathing in an undead world:

Hey there sports fans! 

Sorry I haven’t been around but apart from finishing my archiving assignment and transitioning to a new one, I have caught a case of the Space Flu.  I spent my birthday not being able to budge and vomiting more than Linda Blair during casting week. I haven’t strayed from my apartment very far because not only does this flu come with vomit but dizzy spells! Oh yes, dizzy spells.  But despite that I had to go out and pick up what looked to be half of a meth lab. I’m pretty sure if I had gotten any of the stuff with Sufophedine in it I wouldn’t have been allowed to leave the store. But that involved talking to people, infecting people or worse; people infecting me with a worse case of the flu.

I hooked myself up with Ny-quil and ended up tripping balls off of it going in weird mental circles about elephants. I kept seeing elephant shaped things in every movie I was watching. And for the record it wasn’t as if I was watching Jumanji or anything like that. I was watching the “From Dusk Til Dawn” trilogy and some “Hellraiser” and by God I saw fucking elephants. This led me to believe that Ernest Hemmingway was setting some sort of sleeper agent propaganda about abortions into films or some other cryptic weirdness like that. I kinda wished I would have written it down. 

 To catch you non lit folks up on that jab,(spoiler alert) he wrote a short story called “Hills like white elephants” and the subtext is about him taking his girlfriend to the “doctor” to get an abortion. It doesn’t help that I have a white elephant figurine made white marble in my kitchen. Or that I got into a staring contest with it. Somehow, I thought if I made pancakes it would make everything okay.  That only led to a longer staring contest in which I figured that I was too sick to be cooking and I turned off the stove. Fucking elephants.

My ex who had delivered me supplies earlier remarked that I tend to get a little on the Hunter S. Thompson side when I’m isolated and sick. So maybe that helps me understand the Ny-quil weirdness.  My fever didn’t break until today. Longest fever ever. But there is some good news; the job I really wanted came free! And they want to interview me for it. Yay! But God help me I better be over this before Friday or else it might look like I have a severe drinking problem. 

  

Actually as I write this I still feel a wee bit off my rocker. I blame it on nasal pressure which is going to put me back on the couch with dizziness and vomiting to keep me company.  But I am still holding on to this positive ju ju, something great is going to happen! I know but first… I need to feel well enough to get up off the couch.